I’m going to go ahead and say it… I am so proud of myself
I have been through many, pretty horrendous, situations but each time, I bounced back and kept going. At one point, I was very close to giving up and breaking. But you learn who the good people are in your life when you are at such a low, and with the help and support from them, I have continued on my journey in Malta whilst pursuing my passion to teach Pilates.
I don’t quite believe what I’ve endured myself.
It is in my nature to be kind, caring and trusting, so it was a shock when I came across others without these qualities. I’ve been hidden from the world for years, being in hospitals where care is 24/7, around a loving family – effectively protected and safe! Now I have had a lifetime of experience in a condensed amount of time, I consider it express training and education of the world, let’s just say I have learnt a lot!
I am very strong and determined…
…but at one point, it got too much for me, and it wasn’t to anyone’s surprise as to why. I was exhausted, I held my hands up and surrendered, I was booked to go back home. Even though the result of this would have been the life-long hospital treatment in the attempt to save my hands and feet, all I wanted was to be back with my friends and family, to take a sigh of relief.
My guardian angel looked over me in guidance.
I opened my eyes to the supportive and caring people that were here. I was taken aback by the compassion people did have for me when I had been here for such a short time, and thought all I’d done was cause a lot of carnage!
Do I get on the flight back home?!
So it was another week of pure turmoil.My Dad arrived to Malta to help me pack and I was terrified to tell him I had doubts. I had told people that if I stayed, it would be without my parents’ support. So it really took me by surprise when he said they had been questioning it too!I can’t believe the faith and love Mum and Dad showed when they said they had not seen me so healthy in 10 years and to seriously reconsider my decision. I had to remember the reason why I had to move in the first place. For my health.
Did I want to have endured all this, only to lose my hands & feet anyway?!
So over a lot of food and a lot of wine, we made pro and con lists, the implications of each decision and Dad shared with me about some of the tough times he has had in his life. We came to the decision that I had to keep trying in Malta. Waving Dad off on the flight I should have been on was not easy, I felt sick with fear with my new knowledge of how brutal the world could be.
I turned that fear into determination.
I am now finally working in various studios with incredibly talented people, learning and growing to develop my skills as an Instructor. We’ve come together through having a similar ethos and have found friendship too.
I worked hard studying for 2 years to become a fully qualified Pilates Instructor. Training in various fields to be able to help people, and that is what I will do!
When the children of a client in Malta gave me a little gift saying: “Thank you for helping my Daddy get better”, I knew it was all worth fighting for.
My confidence has been broken down, but it is slowly building.
My smile faded but is shining through again.
I have come out the other side even stronger, even healthier and a higher qualified life ninja!